Ever heard these words? “A friend is going to shoot my wedding for free.”

After I bite my tongue really hard, two things happen:

ACTION #1:  I ask them, “do you trust this person?” If they say “yes,” I proceed to ACTION #2.

ACTION #2:  After finding their name, I size up the said photographer. Yes, I judge. GUILTY.AS.CHARGED. Things I look for: If I find no website or an out-dated website with no profile photo and a blog not updated in four months, I hold my breath. If they have consistent work in an easily describable style, which the couple can see and understand, I relax.

—–

I’ve found myself on the receiving end of this conversation TWICE in the last month. Two dear friends I’ve known for 10+ years shared the glorious news recently. You know who you are. I’m still grinning ear-to-ear.

“Do You Offer Discounts?”

*Crickets*

Short answer: No.

Sometimes I forget I’m a wedding photographer. I get all caught up in the story, the connection, and the genuine love. I wanna be there already. Then again, this business pays my mortgage, my insurance, my health insurance, and my retirement. I don’t work for free. I volunteer for free to help people. I indulge in quality exchange for services.

One exception: active duty military receives 10% off. If a solider is willing to die for my freedom, that is the least I can do in return.

What if a clients says, “I have lots of single friends that will be at the wedding and I am sure they will hire you.” I like to think, “a bird in the hand is better than two in the bush.” There are days when I pound my head (repeatedly) asking myself why oh why did I sign up for this?

By discounting weddings in the past, I saw where the extra money went: top-shelf booze and fancy chair coverings. Lesson learned.

Reality Bites

 I’m amazed how many people ask for discounts. Would you walk into a grocery store and dare ask for a discount? Would you ask an OB-GYN friend, “Will you be there to birth my child, assuming you’ll take on the stress, risks, and liability resulting from complications?”

While weddings are not necessarily a life-or-death situation, there are no re-do’s. Yet the pressure drop falls all the time. What if something happens? What if I get in a car accident driving to the ceremony? What if all the memory cards are stolen? Then I not only let down a client, but a friend.

Then the topic of money rolls around. “We don’t have much money. We are paying for it ourselves. It is going to be really simple.” Yada yada yada.

The Options

1). I am a friend at your wedding with a fancy camera (knowing you for at least 10 years is a good rule of thumb). My time and talent is my gift to you and product is available at full cost.

2). You pay full price. Weddings are real business. When discounts start coming into the equation, the artist immediately becomes devalued and the artist turns into a hired hand.

This video illustrates vendor/client relationships in the real world. Sound off with your two cents below!